It’s the most wonderful time of the year – except when your child is having a tantrum! Whether it’s present disappointment, arguing over gifts, stropping because they want to open presents early, refusing to eat their Christmas dinner or they’re fed up of being cooped up indoors for too long, Christmas break can be a tricky time for all of the family.
Highgate based teacher, mum and founder of Mini Mozart, Clare Shaw offers some top festive tips for parents and carers on how to help your young child to deal with distressing situations during the Christmas season.
Provide some routine and structure
Sticking to a routine during the festive break can be challenging if you’re travelling or hosting friends and family. Try to preserve at least a few routines to give your little ones a sense of stability when they’re struggling with instability in their emotions. Make the day predictable with consistent sleep and meal times. Communication is also key. Explain to your child where they’re going, who is coming, what will happen, what is expected of them and why.
Set an example
Children learn by example and one of the best ways to show them how to keep calm is by keeping calm yourself. It’s not easy when you’re tired and stressed but try to use gentle and reassuring language and demonstrate patience and empathy when your child is upset. By showing them how to navigate their own emotions with grace and resilience, you’re providing them with invaluable tools for self-regulation.
Use music to create a sense of calm
If necessary, leave the bigger Christmas party group and have some one-to-one time. Music is a really powerful tool for helping little ones with big emotions. Soothing melodies and gentle lullabies can calm frayed nerves. Having some time out is important; it will help your little one to recharge and be ready to enter the merry holiday fray.
Validate their feelings
Whether they’re expressing joy, frustration or sadness, let them know that their feelings are perfectly normal and that it’s okay to feel what they are feeling.
Teach coping strategies
This could be as simple as taking deep breaths together, counting to ten or using a favourite stuffed animal or blanket as a comfort object. Encourage your child to identify what helps them to feel better when they’re upset and empower them to use these strategies whenever they need them.
Mum of two Clare says: “As parents, we know all too well the challenges that come with helping our little ones to navigate the rollercoaster of feelings that accompany this time of year. With familiar and regular routines slipping, young children are more likely to have meltdowns especially when they’ve had too many sweets, when they’re hungry, when they have to socialise with family/friends they are unfamiliar with or when it’s past their bedtime – and who can blame them!”
She added: “Kids also feel our stress and they respond to it. It can be confusing and upsetting for them when we are not spending as much time with them as we usually do and we have less patience with them. To minimise meltdowns, help your child to understand what’s going on by getting them involved in the preparations such as present shopping, wrapping, baking and setting the table. Also talk to them about what to expect, this will help to put them at ease and make them feel more settled.”
Featured Photo by Anastasiia Chepinska on Unsplash.
